How are you coping?

Near the beginning of my cancer journey, both Peter and I were studying the Bible and came to realize that we weren’t looking at life the way God wanted us to. Matthew 6:27 says, “And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life?” Anxiety is a futile pastime that accomplishes nothing. Jesus says, “…do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble” (Matthew 6:34). So we have been striving to live one day at a time. We do not do this perfectly! But it is very comforting when I’m having an anxious moment and Peter reminds me “you are here today.” I need to live in the today. And I can take comfort that I am indeed here today.

My thoughts may turn anxious, depressing, or angry some days. Usually, they are small portions of my day but sometimes they can last a day or two. There are times when something as little as a television commercial about retirement can fill me with anger over my diagnosis. I know I will probably not live long enough to retire with Peter. I blame my cancer for limiting my life and the ability to enjoy many things I want to be able to do (travel, shopping, cooking, homeschooling, ministry, etc.).

When I find myself despising the affliction God has allowed in my life or fearing what the future holds, I turn to prayer. Jesus died on the cross so I could have my sins forgiven. This gives me confidence to talk to the Creator of the Universe, the Most Holy God, about all my cares and concerns. All my sins and weaknesses are before Him and He still loves me. I am covered by the blood of Jesus and can find help in my time of need (Hebrews 4:14-16).

So this is my hope. God’s steadfast love never ceases and His mercies never come to an end (Lamentations 3: 21-26).

I discuss more of the way I approach my “mental health” in another post. You can read it here.

Will You Run Out of Treatment Options?

The short answer is no. Most likely my body will wear out before we can exhaust all the various treatment options which continue to multiply. The doctors cannot predict how my body and my specific type of cancer will respond to treatment now or in the future.  I am thankful for God giving me a wonderful medical team through the University of Virginia and the Mayo Clinic. But even with brilliant doctors who care for me well, my life is in God’s hands.  He determined the number of my days before I was ever born.  So I must rest in His sovereign purpose for how and when my cancer responds to treatment.

How Many More Chemo Treatments Do You Have?

I don’t know. I started chemotherapy (Abraxane) in May 2021. I had my last infusion the last week of January 2022. We are thankful for the benefit we received from such a long time on this treatment. And it is possible that I will try another chemo in the future.  But it is hard on my body and Peter and the kids hated seeing me suffer. We are hopeful for fewer side effects on my next treatment plan.