Peter Witkowski Ecclesiology, Pain & Suffering

Pastor, Don’t Make Church Your Therapy Session: Send the Ark Back

When the sorrows of illness, grief, or family trials swallow a pastor’s heart, he must take note of king David and resist the temptation to allow his anguish to disrupt his congregation’s fellowship with the Lord through the normal means of grace.

King David’s Principle

Though King David lacked the more traditional qualifications tied to pastoral or priestly authority, his kingship still possessed a spiritual dimension. The Lord had called King David into a covenant relationship with Him so that the nation of Israel would be able to commune with God through David’s wise rule. As David notes in Psalm 101:6,8, “I will look with favor on the faithful in the Land, that they may dwell with me…Morning by morning I will destroy all the wicked in the land.”

And like contemporary pastors and elders, David faced struggles in his private life that disrupted his ability to care for the people of Israel. In 2 Samuel 15, Absalom successfully launched a revolution that forced David to flee his capital with a small contingent of troops and advisors. As they marched out of the city, David saw the priests carrying the ark of the covenant out of the city. But instead of applauding the priests’ devotion to him, David told them to reverse course. “Carry the ark of God back into the city. If I find favor in the eyes of the Lord, he will bring me back and let me see both it and his dwelling place (2 Sam 15:25).”

David made this decision because he knew that God revealed himself through the ark. When the priest sprinkled the ark’s mercy seat with the blood of the sin offering, they taught God’s people that only a blood sacrifice could atone for their sins. The priests also stood before the ark to gain insights into God’s will for them. The Lord told Moses in Exodus 25:22: “There I will meet with you, and from above the mercy seat, from between the two cherubim that are on the ark of the testimony, I will speak with you about all that I will give you in commandment for the people of Israel.” In other words, the ark was the center of divine revelation. It was how and where the people learned of and experienced the saving mercy of God. The ministry of the ark was a foretaste of the ministry of the church. Though events had disrupted David’s access to the normal rhythms of worship, David would not allow his sorrows to disrupt his people’s access to the revelations of God’s mercy.

In the new covenant, God conveys his mercy through the preaching of the word and through the practice of baptism and the Lord’s Supper. Despite these changes, the principle that guided David still remains in place. The pastor should not allow his suffering to disrupt his church’s ministry of mercy. He should resist the urge to abandon his sermon series on Romans in favor of a ten-week series on betrayal or to abandon the Lord’s table for a panel discussion on grief. He should not replace his sermons with stream of conscienceless derived from his suffering. In other words, he should not transform the church service into his therapy session.

He should send the ark back and work with his elders and fellow church members to ensure that the church keeps declaring the whole counsel of God. As Paul reminds his mentee in the faith Timothy, “Keep a close watch on yourself and on the teaching. Persist in this, for by so doing you will save both yourself and your hearers (1 Tim 4:16).” The preaching of the full counsel of God is not ancillary to but the very antidote for the pastor’s sorrows. It is also how his congregation finds salvation and sanctification. As John Calvin says, “By the preaching of his gospel he helps us so to grow in faith and patience that we are able to bear every trial.” Do not disrupt the regular means of grace.  Keep the ark in Jerusalem.

Keeping Preaching

Sometimes, the pastor will have to surrender the ministry of the church to his fellow elders because the nature of his crisis prevents him for serving in the normal rhythms of the church. But when the crisis passes and the pastor returns to his public duties, he still must not deviate from the regular means of grace.

Like King David, John Calvin once found himself exiled from the city of Geneva. When Calvin returned to the city three years later, he preached the verse that followed the last verse from the last sermon he had preached prior to his exile. He neither give vent to his sorrows nor disrupted the church’s normal displays of grace. In so doing, Calvin helped his congregation understand in the words of Dr. Timothy George that: “The Reformation was not about Calvin or any other personality. Much less about the ups and downs of church politics…the Reformation was about the Word of God”

What was true of Calvin and the Reformation should be true of every church. Moreover, the pastor’s mission does not change with his circumstances. As the apostle Paul says, “Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching (2 Tim 4:2).” Calvin explains, “When we have the word of truth we must not depart from it in any way, nor be so fickle that we are driven first one way and then another. We must be able to dispense the word well and rightly so that our people are fed.”

Admittedly, pastors will misstep at times like the priest did and take the ark a few steps into their suffering. When they do, their fellow elders and church members should take up the mantel of David. They should lovingly encourage the man to return the ark. The pastor should then humbly confess his sin to his congregation and return the ark back to its proper place. Understanding that their pastor stands in need of grace, the local church should warmly grant their pastor forgiveness just as Jews welcomed king David back to Jerusalem and Swiss welcomed back Calvin to Geneva.

Two More Principles

This argument does not negate the pastor’s need to suffer within the context of the local church community. He should not hide his sorrows nor pretend that he does not hurt. Like other church members, he should make use of the godly counsel and the servant hearts of his congregation. Just like the young dad overwhelmed by fatherhood, the pastor should be able to process his struggles with faithful brothers and depend on the kind old ladies for meals. The other elders and church members should also carry on with the ministry of the word and the sacraments when the pastor cannot, knowing that the ministry of the church depends not on single man but the Lord. Outside of the Lord, the local church should be the pastor’s greatest resource during his times of suffering.

Moreover, the example of David also does not negate the shaping influence of the pastor’s suffering upon his life and ministry. As Paul notes in 2 Corinthians 1:4, the God of all comfort takes pastors and others through the valleys of suffering in-part so that they “may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.” To quote Charles Spurgeon: “A man’s own experience should be to him the laboratory in which he tests the medicines which he prescribes for others.” Having faithfully applied the gospel to his heart, the pastor will be better apply the medicine of the gospel to the suffering souls that sit in his church’s pews and in his office. Just as Calvin’s and David’s exile turned out for their good, God promises to use the pastor’s suffering for the good of the pastor and his congregation. The pastor’s ministry should be shaped by the benefits of Christians suffering.

Final Thoughts

But the pastor’s suffering should not be allowed to interrupt the church’s practice of the normal means of grace. He should not take the church captive to his needs. Rather, the pastor should send the ark back to Jerusalem.

Peter Witkowski Memos

Jesus Wept and We Should Too: The Resurrection, Sovereignty and Grief

Jesus wept. This short verse mercifully demonstrates that Jesus can and does as the Bible says elsewhere, “sympathize with our weakness (Heb 4:15).” In that weeping over the death of his friend Lazarus, Jesus legitimized the tears of every grieving husband, wife, child, mother, father, and friend. Jesus knew the soul penetrating pain of our grief.

Should We Grieve?

Though this moment in the biblical timeline grants us the permission to grieve and to grieve deeply, some within the church still find the topic of grief distasteful if not at points unspiritual. They fear that grief could be a denial of the resurrection or of God’s sovereign goodness. Since they know that their loved one is alive with Jesus and that no death is an accident, they view death to be little more than a brief interruption in their daily rhythm. They do not mourn when their husband takes his Sunday nap, why should they now mourn his death?

Such a perspective can be a good and helpful remedy against “excessive grief” or depression. But it cannot banish grief all together, for it was never meant to do so.

Does the Resurrection Banish Grief?

As Martha mourned the death of her brother Lazarus, she tells Jesus, “I know that he will rise again in the resurrection on the last day (Jn 11:24).” And not only did she have faith in the resurrection, but she also knew the resurrection. Jesus told Martha, “I am the resurrection and the life.” Because Jesus was Immanuel, God with us – the sacrificial lamb who saves us from our sins through his death and resurrection, he can in good faith command: “Lazarus, come out.” John concludes the story with these words: “The man who had died came out, his hands and feed bound with the linen strips, and his face wrapped with a cloth. Jesus said to them, “Unbind him, and let him go (11:44).” Jesus did not simply believe in the resurrection. He was the resurrection, the very guarantee and cause of eternal life. In other words, he was the the solution to or the very antidote for death. And still, he wept.

Does Sovereignty Banish Grief?

Moreover, Jesus knew that Lazarus’s death was not an accident brought about by the winds of chance while the heavenly Father was preoccupied with some disaster. The Son in accordance with the Father had ordained the death of Lazarus. Describing the Son’s relationship to the Father, the British pastor Charles Spurgeon noted, “Jesus is to the Father what speech is to us; he is the unfolding of the Father’s thoughts, the revelation of the Father’s heart.” When messengers came from Mary and Martha seeking Jesus’s help – a help that could have resulted in Lazarus’ full recovery, Jesus acting with the Father by the Holy Spirit chose not to come. John’s gospel reports, “Now Jesus loved Martha and her sister and Lazarus. So, when he heard that Lazarus was ill, he stayed two days longer in the place where he was (Jn 11:5).” Jesus understood the thoughts of the Father and knew that his friend would die so that others might believe. He knew that even death glorified God. And still, he wept.

Why Does Jesus Weep?

Why does the resurrection and the Word become flesh, grieve? Why as John reports was Jesus, “deeply moved in his spirit and greatly troubled (11:38).”  He was moved by love. Allowing the crowd to interpret Jesus’s action for us, John offers the following commentary on Jesus’s tears: “So the Jews said, “See how he loved him!” Deep soul wrenching tears do not convey unbelief but love. To grieve is to express that goodness and sweetness has been lost. It does not deny the goodness that is to come nor the wisdom that has brought us to the point of tears and aching, but rather affirms the unsatisfactory nature of this broken world and our longing for Christ to come again (and to borrow another’s phrase) and “make everything sad untrue.” As the puritan John Flavel noted, “There is no sin in complaining to God…Griefs are eased by groans and heart-pressures relieved by utterances.”

In other words, faith does not call the believer to vanquish grief from his psyche but rather grants him the assurances needed to safely express his anguish. He does not have to fear that his soul altering loss will forever trap him in that dark and swirling vortex of depression. Jesus conquered the tomb and has prepared a mansion for us. As Jesus told Martha, “Whoever believes in me, though he die, yet he shall live,  and everyone who lives and believes in me shall never die (Jn 11:25-26).” With heaven secured, the believer can confidently lay claim to the promise of Psalm 23:4 which states, “Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.” We do not grieve apart from Jesus but with Jesus, knowing that grief finds its end, its telos, in the steadfast love of our Lord (1 Thess 4:13). He will guide us home. In other words, the resurrection and God’s sovereignty are not antithetical to grief but the very bumpers that keep us from rolling into the gutters of hopelessness as we traverse the lanes of grief. If ever there should be a people that was comfortable with the uncomfortable nature of tears, it should be the people of Jesus.

Jesus wept. May we go and do likewise.

Peter Witkowski Memos

Memo: April Gentry Witkowski Death Announcement

Editor’s Note: April’s Funeral will be Friday July First at 3:30PM at Amissville Baptist Church. The viewing will begin at 2:30PM.

My dearest April Gentry Witkowski died last night (June 25) at 9:15PM thirteen days after her 39th birthday. Following our evening scripture devotion and our singing of Worthy of Worship, I left April to tuck in our three precious children. As I came downstairs several minutes later, I discovered that April too had found rest…her final rest in the merciful and loving arms of our Lord and savior.

No man could have had a more glorious wife, nor children a more loving mother, nor family and friends a kinder companion than April. Undoubtedly, the hearts underneath our tear-stained faces will ache with unbelievable sorrow. And yet hope remains for we know that our savior lives, and that April lives with him. By God’s grace, I believe we can do the unthinkable and press forward in a world without my glorious, purplely person for I know that I will one day soon spend an eternity with her.

Oh how, “Precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of his Saints.” – Psalm 116:15

Thank you for loving us well. May, God be Glorified!

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