March 17, 2014July 28, 2024 Peter Witkowski Pain & Suffering, Parenting

Caring For Those In Crisis: A Pastor’s Response To Zack’s Death

This past Friday, the Mayberry folksiness of Eastman was jolted by the depths of evil. The story of how three-year-old Zack was cruelly beaten to death has brought sadness to most every home in the area. And now as his family and the community grapple with the tragic death of this beloved toddler, the questions of “Why,” “How,” and “What now” begin to fill our brains. We want to know, “Where was God” on Friday, March 14, 2014.

How to Care For the Community

God was sitting on his throne in heaven (Col 3:1). He was not caught off guard. Nor was he in heaven wishing he could intervene but lacking the power to act. Our God had the power to stop little Zack’s death. He also had the power to save my son from death last summer. But he chose not to appear either on March 14, 2014 or on July 16, 2013. Although none of us fully sees into the mind of God, the Bible does reveal why Jesus delays his return and allows evil to go on unchecked in many forms.

In 2 Peter 3:9-10, we read that, “The Lord is not slow to fulfill his promise as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing that any should perish, but that all should reach repentance.” Jesus hasn’t come again because he wants to save sinners. When Jesus returns to earth, he will descend with a flaming sword to judge the wicked. Once he breaks through the clouds, sinners will have no hope of salvation. Consequently, God waits not because he has forgotten justice, not because he powerless to stop evil, and not because he cares little about human suffering. He waits so that he can extend grace and salvation to the lost.

As believers, we should long for Jesus to return, praying for him to come quickly and end the violent suffering that Zack and many others have experienced. On that glorious day, babies will no longer die; old men will not tire (Isaiah 65:20). Until then, let’s redeem these evil days by proclaiming the gospel to a lost and dying world. When Jesus was asked in Luke 13 about why certain men suffered a violent death, he responded by calling men and women to repent. When our community asks about this tragedy, let’s share the gospel. Christ is coming back! “The day of the Lord will come like thief and the heavens will pass away with a roar, and the heavenly bodies will be burned up and dissolved, and the earth and the works that are done on it will be exposed” (2 Peter 2:10).

How to Care For the Family

I confess that I have no idea what Zack’s family is experiencing. But the scriptures do provide Christians with a framework for ministering to those who are suffering. Below are nine principles to follow as we seek to minister to broken hearted,

Be with those suffering. The first step towards ministering to those who are grieving is to grieve (Rom. 12:15). Jesus wept when he went to see Lazarus (John 11:35). Job’s friends understood this principle as well, initially sitting with Job in silence for seven days because they “saw that his suffering was very great” (Job 2:13).
Meet physical needs. The best way to demonstrate our love of God of others is to practically minister to those in crisis (Matt. 4:10; James 2:18).
Don’t assume you know why a person or family is suffering. I do not know specifically why I or others suffer. And quite frankly, no human being can know “why” apart from divine revelation. To presume to know the divine reasoning for why someone suffers and why someone else rejoices is the height of human arrogance. By appointing yourself god, you will only bring despair and pain to those who are hurting. God’s thoughts are far higher and better than ours (Isaiah 55:8-9). Resist the temptation that overcame the disciples in John 9 and Job’s friends.
Do not encourage sin. In many physiological circles people are told to get angry with God when they suffer. However in scripture, we are told to respond with faith and trust (Proverbs 3:5). We should hate all human sin and mourn the fallen pains of nature. But we should not encourage those who are suffering to blame God as Job’s wife did. Rather, we should encourage them to be like Job and not “sin or charge God with wrong doing” (Job 1:22).
Point the broken hearted to the God who comforts the weak. Romans 8:28-39 is by far one of the best passages for developing a theology of suffering. But I would not open to Romans initially. Begin with God’s goodness. Offer the hurting expressions for their grief and reminders of hope by turning to Psalm 23, or Lamentations 3:1-26, or Psalm 34. Remind them that God is here and will care for his children.
Encourage them with the truth that babies and innocent children are taken to heaven at death. David was able to stop grieving for his dead son because he knew his son was in paradise (2 Sam. 12:23; I Kings 14:12-13).
Speak truth in love, seeking to edify. Everything we post on Facebook or tweet should be done to encourage and help the family, keeping their situation in mind. Refrain from gossip and idle chatter (Eph. 4:29).
Continue loving them in the days ahead. As Christians, we should respond to crisis, but ministry continues for a lifetime (I Peter 4:10-11).
Pray for them, asking God to love them, comfort them, and meet their needs through his divine power (Col. 1:11).

March 13, 2014July 8, 2014 Peter Witkowski Babies and Birth, Discipleship, Parenting

Preaching To Little People

God Saves Little People

The precious little people that made up our kids church were bouncing through doorways, scooting under pin pong tables, and ducking around railings. As I tried to herd our cookie infused kids towards their parents, a lady pulled me aside to tell me that her grandson was ready for baptism. I was a completely caught off guard.

Her grandson was a pleasant, little guy. But he was at best a casual church attender with a shaky knowledge of the gospel, and a passion for M17 video games. Over the course of the next few weeks, the church’s pastor and I discovered that this grandmother was not motivated by a low view of baptism. She was driven by a heavy burden of spiritual responsibility.

She (like many other Christian parents and grandparents) loved her grandson. Being the main Christian influence in his life, the grandmother brought her grandson to church every chance she got. At some point, she had assumed the responsibility for her grandson’s salvation. Now, she wanted to get him baptized in an effort to get him eternal life. But the great news is that we as parents and grandparents are not responsible for saving our little people. We can’t and we are not supposed to. God saves! As parents and grandparents, we are called to preach the gospel to little people through our life and words. This is a task is a task we can do with the Lord’s help!

Walking For Little People

Before we begin plopping little people down in plastic pews, we have to walk with Jesus. In Deuteronomy 6, we read that we are to, “careful to do” all the commands of God so that it “may go well with you” (Deut. 6:3). Jesus reiterated this command in John 12:26a saying, “If anyone serves me, he must follow me; and where I am there will my servant be also.” If we want our children to follow Christ, we must walk with Christ day in and day out. We need to let the Word of God drive our actions at home, at work, at night, in the morning, and at every point of our life. Every aspect of our lives need to daily reflect transforming power of the cross.

If we don’t, our little people will know. In addition to being candy lovers, our children are also gifted hypocrisy detectors. They may not say it (because quite frankly most two-year-olds have yet to add hypocrite to their vocabulary), but they know when our actions deny our words. If family worship is a prayer during a commercial timeout of the final four, our little people know that you love Georgia Bulldogs or more than gospel.

And when we mess up by skipping a family devotion to watch the last episode of The Bachelor or by angrily snapping at our son when he interrupts our game of angry birds, we can still use the situation to proclaim Christ. There is no stronger testimony of the gospel to a child than of a parent humbling asking forgiveness and repenting from of a sin. By humbling ourselves, we show out little people that the power of Christ is real and brings about real life change (I Peter 2:24). Let’s walk in truth.

Preaching The Gospel To Little People

But walking is not enough; we also need to preach truth to our little people. According to Ephesians 6:4, we are told to raise our children in the discipline and admonition of the Lord. We have the awesome opportunity to teach the gospel to our babies, preschoolers, and oh so cool middle schoolers. So what do we say? We preach the story of the Bible, namely that:

God is the good, all-powerful, and just creator of the universe, existing as one God in three persons. Duet. 4:35; Ps 47:7-8; Col. 1:16-17; Matt. 28:19.
Adam and Eve sinned bringing death and suffering into the world. Because of sin, we now are all sinners deserving of death because we have all sinned. Gen 3:1-7; Rom. 5:12-21; Rom. 3:23.
Christ came to save us from our sins by living a perfect life, dying on the cross, and rising from the dead. Heb. 4:15; I Peter 3:18; I Peter 1:3-5; I Cor. 15:1-9.
Repent of your sins and trust Christ as your Lord and savior. John 3:16; John 3:36; Rom. 10:9; Act 2:38.
Put on the new man created in Christ Jesus. Eph. 4:24; Col. 3:10; Matt. 3:8; 2 Cor. 5:17.

If you are looking for some more gospel resources to help you understand how to reach your kids with the gospel, I highly recommend:

The Gospel in Context PowerPoint presentation by One-Eighty Counseling & Education
Appendix A of The Faithful Parent by Dr. Stuart Scott
The Gospel Plan For Me a Lifeway tract
Big Truths For Young Hearts by Dr. Bruce Ware

Getting Down With The Little People

Now practically, we do not need to have “organized” clinical gospel sessions with our kids. Yes, we should embrace some form of family worship where we can work through the gospel together as a family by reading through scripture and/or devotional materials. But, gospel proclamation is not limited to the family room. As Moses makes clear in Deuteronomy six, we are to instruct our children in righteousness on the baseball diamond, on the floor of the den as you wrestle, and when you tuck your little gal into bed. We are to see every life circumstance as having the potential to lead to a spiritual conversation. Preach the gospel!

The Little People Results

By laying a foundation of gospel proclamation, we get the amazing privilege of playing an instrumental role in our child’s spiritual life. Faith comes through hearing (Rom 10:17). If we faithfully proclaim the gospel with our words and actions, it’s very possible that we as parents will get to lead our children to Christ. Again, this is what Moses anticipates in Deuteronomy 6:20. He anticipates that little people will to turn to their parents for guidance about reaching eternity.

No Magic Pill For Little People

Now unfortunately the steps listed above are not a magic pill. Just as baptism could not ensure the salvation of the grandson mentioned earlier, faithful walking and preaching to a little one does not guarantee their salvation. The spiritual world is not an adding machine. “As John MacArthur writes:

…equipping a child with spiritual truth is no guarantee he or she will follow Christ. I know many diligent parents and grandparents whose hearts have been broken by a family member’s rejection of Christ. We can only plant the seeds by teaching and living out the truth. How they respond is out of our hands.” (Fitzpatrick, Newheiser, & Hendrickson, p. 27)

All of our little guys and gals are sinners born with sin blackened hearts. God must save them just as he saved us. And the Holy Spirit is like the wind, refusing to be manipulated by well-meaning parents and grandparents (John 3:8). But here is the good news. We are not called to save little people. We are called to point them to Christ. This we can do. And until the day we see our little people express and demonstrate faith in the one true God, I invite you to join me in fervently praying for their salvation!

Questions For Reflection

I am living the Christian life well? Are there things such as money, pleasure, sports, shopping etc. that come before Christ?
Have you asked your spouse and children to honestly evaluate your life?
Are the sins you need to repent of and patterns that you need to change? What are they?
Do you have family devotions? Do you preach the gospel to your little people?

Recommend Books

Fitzpatrick, E., Newheiser, J., & Hendrickson, D. L. (2001). When Good Kids Make Bad Choices. Eugene: Harvest House Publishers .

Martha Peace, S. W. (2001). The Faithful Parent: A Biblical Guide to Raising A Family . Philipsberg: R&R Publishing .

Ware, B. A. (2009). Big Truths For Young Hearts: Teaching and Learning the Greatness of God . Wheaton: Crossway.

March 6, 2014July 8, 2014 Peter Witkowski Discipleship, Parenting

Onesies: The Doctrine of Salvation

Being the hopeless romantic that I am, I decided to go above and beyond for my wife’s past birthday. I searched and dug until I found the perfect gift that made flowers and Godiva chocolate seem like gumballs. I presented her with a Chicago Cubs onesie for our recently conceived son (Since the two were still one, I thought it an appropriate gift). Because my wife is amazing, she was wowed by my gift! She was also quite amused and not for the reason you are thinking. You see, it seems that the great “onesie” creator decided to make onesies in more than one size. Who would have thought? Recent predictions project baby Witkowski to be wearing the Chicago Cubs onesie sometime around the year 2016.

I have since learned that onesie sizes go from preemie to adult XXXL. In a much, much more grandeur way, the free gift of salvation also does not have an age limit or time sensitive restrictions. The seven-year-old child comes to Christ in the exact same way as the seventy-seven-year old man. They both only need to believe on the Lord Jesus Christ to be saved! Becoming a Christian is easier than choosing the correct onesie. God has done all the work.

God Does It All

Because God is holy, sin must be punished (Is. 13:11). And our punishment for sin is death in this life followed by eternal separation from God’s love in hell. This is our fate. To avoid death, we have to be perfect. If we commit one sin, we are doomed (James 2:10). And as anyone who has kept a class full two-year-old onesie wearing babies can tell you, perfection is impossible as our very natures are corrupt from birth.

Jesus Pays For Us

But being fully man and fully God, Christ lived a perfect life. He offered himself on the cross as a sacrifice for our sins. Knowing that we deserved divine judgment, Jesus intervened in human history following the plan of God the Father. By surrendering himself to the cross, Jesus lifted the burden of sin from the shoulders of believers. He who was perfect became sin for us (II Cor. 5:21). He was, as Romans 3:25-26 makes clear, our penal (legal) substitution. In the eyes of God’s divine justice, Jesus us took our punishment. He experienced God’s wrath for our sin and felt the eternal separation from God’s love that we deserved. He was the perfect sacrifice for our sins. By his wounds, we were healed (1 Peter 2:24).

God Calls Us

Because we are corrupt from birth, we do not naturally seek after the salvation that Christ made possible (Rom. 3:10-12). “If God were to leave it up to us, not a single person would ever want to be with God, and no one would ever desire to do what pleases God” (Ware, p. 172). But, God in his mercy actually seeks after his children! In Romans 8:30, Paul tells us that Christians are called by God! We begin to question our allegiance to the lust of the flesh, to the lust of the eyes and to the boastful pride of life because God is calling us and drawing us to himself through scripture, other believers, nature, and the happenings going on around us.

The Holy Spirit Regenerates Us

But God does not stop with calling! He also transforms. He saves us. John 1:13 reports that we were saved, “not by blood nor the will of flesh nor of the will of man, but of God.” God takes our hearts of stone and makes them hearts of flesh (Ez. 36:26). As Ephesians 2 makes clear, we were dead in our trespasses and sins. Having worked as a hospital chaplain, I’ve seen many dead bodies. And dead bodies are a tad unsettling because they sit lifeless in the bed with eyes and mouths frozenly open. But no sounds come out; no muscles twitch. In the same way, we are spiritual dead, lacking all power to respond to the gospel. But God who is rich in mercy made us alive. He gives us hearts of flesh enabling us to respond to the gospel with belief and faith. He regenerates our hearts, infusing them with life by his power.

Jesus Justifies Us

And when the Holy Spirit regenerates us, we get the righteousness of Christ (II Cor. 5:21). Those who believe in Christ are fully justified from all sins both past and future. Christ becomes our sin, and we get his righteousness. We are no longer are under condemnation. When God looks at us, he sees only the righteousness of his son.

God Adopts Us

And it gets better! Because we have been clothed in the righteousness of Christ, God makes us his sons and daughters (Rom 8:15-16). We now have the privileges that come with being a member of God’s family. We are led by the Holy Spirit. When we fall into sin, God’s disciplines us so that we flee lawlessness and return faith stronger than before. And lastly, being adopted entitles us to a divine inheritance full of imperishable heavenly rewards. Praise God for his love and mercy!

So What Now?

If you are like me you are probably wondering, “What roll do we play in our salvation if God does everything?” Are we as irrelevant as an onesie on a fashion walkway? The answer is no. We repent and believe (Acts 2:38)! As Dr. Bruce Ware explains,

“The only thing we can rightly do, and the one thing we should do, is this: we should bow our heads and admit before God that we are helpless to save ourselves. We are unable to make ourselves come alive…But that’s not all. We also know that God is kind and that he comes to those who are humble before him (see Isaiah 57:15)…We should put our hope in the kindness of God, his mercy toward sinners, and his power to save those who admit they cannot save themselves…He alone is our hope” (Ware, p. 160)

Embrace Jesus who saves!