Peter Witkowski Memos

Memo: April’s Breast Cancer Announcement

blog-post-cancer

Our hearts grinded to an abrupt stop on Friday, May 17, 2019 at 2:30 PM. Like standing on an island of doom in the middle of a Walmart shopping aisle, first April and then I could only hear two words echoing over the waves of life: “metastatic cancer.”

The day before my dear wife, April, had had an MRI scan performed on her lower back. We feared a slipped disc, medical bills, and few weeks of recovery. All these outcomes were serious but none were insurmountable. But the report that reached our ears as we managed to pick out cheese puffs and cans of condensed milk spoke of a challenge that would press our faith to its end. April had metastatic cancer. My bride, my best friend, and my favorite counselor, and Luke, Lily, and Lacey’s mommy was sick beyond belief.

Just a day before we would celebrate the seventh anniversary of our engagement when April told me, “Oh yes” as I presented her with a ring on one knee, we found ourselves staring into the hopeless waves of death.

We spent the ensuing Friday afternoon and the following five days in a daze. We sat in doctor’s office after doctor’s office and learned that April’s blood work, CT Scan, mammogram, ultrasounds, and biopsy all confirmed the original foreboding report of stage four breast cancer.

Though we are still in the process of determining the scope and nature of April’s treatment plan, we believe April should be able to maintain a high quality of life for at least the next 5-7 years (We hope to beat that number, given April’s youth and vitality). April and I at times find this news encouraging. Multiple times over the last nine days, we have feared that April had only months to live. Conversations about years seems far more promising than those about days and months. Yet, we still find the news to be an audaciously formidable tempest. It’s sovereign winds will push our little family into an uncharted ocean, containing many highs and lows. We hope to navigate safely through the waves for the next five years; and then, we will attempt to make it another five years. And will happily take another five after that and beyond.

April and Lacy 2019But our ultimate hope resides not in medicine or treatments or doctors. Our hope rests in Christ. We believe that April’s sickness was sent as Jesus said in John 9:3, “that the works of God might be displayed,” in her. We believe God would be glorified through April being saved from these waves of cancerous death. She and I and our families have prayed like never before, pleading for our God to hear our cries. As we cry, we trust God will not give us snakes and stones but, “good thing[s] to those who ask him (Matt. 7:7-11)!”  As Paul reminds us, God, “is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think according to the power at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus thought all generations, forever and ever. Amen.” This is the God we turn to in faith, pleading for healing for April. He is our hope and our strong tower.

And we look to God for miraculous help not because we our worthy of God’s special favor. April and I both identify with the Psalmist when he says, “If you, O Lord, should mark iniquities, O Lord, who could stand?” We know we have no right to stand before God; we have nothing to offer him as our service, our abilities, our talents, and our earthly attainments come from him. Rather, we appeal to our God because he is the God who forgives. As the Psalmist reminds us “But with you there is forgiveness that you may be feared.” April and I can approach the throne room of God because Jesus has saved us from our sins. Jesus’ loving father is our loving father. We know that the God who saves week and feeble sinners is the same God who delivers the sick from illness. Jesus raised Lazarus from dead because he had redeemed his soul. We plead with God to save April from the clutches of death because of He has triumphed over the Grave and sits at the right hand of the father!

Pray

Pray for God to be glorified through April’s sickness.

Pray for April’s salvation from cancer. Pray she is healed and the Lord prolongs her life.

Pray that our children will not be harden to the gospel because of April’s sickness.

Pray for God to grow and to strengthen our faith and the faith of all touched by this trial.

Pray that we would not fear the suffering that is before us but each day find the strength we need in Christ alone.

How Can I Help As I Pray?

1. Point us and our family to Christ! As the Psalmist reminds us in Psalm 130:5, “I wait for the Lord, my soul waits and in his word I hope.” We need the Word of God. April is fighting cancer, but she and I and our family are ultimately fighting for our faith in the midst of cancer. And the best encouragement for the weak and hurting is the Word of God. Pray God’s promises for us. Write to us of God’s promises. And tells us of God’s promises when you give us hugs.

2. Join us in grieving this evil. Cancer is evil. The creation groans with the agony of sin (Rom 8:19-23). We should cry, pray, and plead when evil touches the core of our hearts. The Gospel is predicated on the idea that we exchanged the perfection of Eden for bodies of death. April’s cancer is a sign of that exchange. It reminds us of why Christ came and why we need him to come again. We should grief her illness and cry out to God about this evil, trusting in God’s ability to triumph over evil.

IMG_57973. Celebrate April’s life. My dear wife is very much with me, our three kids, and our church family today. Breast cancer threatens her, our marriage, and our kids. But her cancer has not won and does not define her. She is first and foremost still a daughter of the king, a laborer for the fields ripe for harvest. As part of the people of God, April and I are hoping for God to do above and beyond what we think possible. And as we navigate this storm, we rejoice in the reality that every day is gift from God! Psalm 3:4-5 states, “I cried aloud to the Lord, and he answered me from his holy hill. Selah I lay down and slept; I woke again, for the Lord sustained me.” Do not mourn her and pity her. Celebrate the God who sustains her!

4. Please share secondary helps cautiously and hug us more. April’s hope and my hope for this time is not an essential oil or a vitamin supplement, or an exercise plan. Friends, our hope is in God. Psalm 119:92-93 says, “If your law had not been my delight, I would have perished in my affliction. I will never forget your precepts, for by them you have given me life.” The power for life, the ability to keep going, and the hope for tomorrow does not come from our attempts at fixing this broken world. It comes from God.

We do not discount the natural aids of God. We are surrounded by faithful friends who are working tirelessly to help us find the best medical care available. Pray for them and for us to have wisdom. But our hope is not modern medicine. And our hope is not some magic elixir. Our hope is God’s amazing love for his people.

Moreover, the best and most scriptural secondary helps are hugs and hospitality, and care. We welcome those! See below.

5. We welcome physical and practical help. Though we do not know all of our needs at this point, we know we cannot walk this journey alone. We need and most defiantly have the help of our family. We need the love and support of our church family. And we embrace the love and prayers from our brothers and sisters around the world.

We will also need help with doctor’s appointments, childcare, meals, medical costs and a host of other things as we discover our new normal. We will know more about our needs over the next few weeks.

At the moment, we are doing well. April’s family is here with us in Virginia and friends both at Amissville Baptist Church and from afar are helping us with the medical side of things.

Contact Info:

At this time, we ask that you direct offers to Amissvillebc@comcast.net or to biblefighter@gmail.com 

You can reach us via snail-mail at : P.O. Box 637/ Amissville, VA 20106

You are also welcome two reach out to the elders of Amissville Baptist Church, Mark Hockensmith and Bill Brown, at: 540-937-6159.

Click here for our GOFundMe Page

Though April and I welcome inquirers and emails, calls, and texts of support, they can be overwhelming at times. We appreciate your patience with our responses.

We do plan to also keep posting updates here at witkowskiblog.com

Thank you for your love, prayers, and never-ending support.

God is good!

Sustained By Grace Through Faith,

Peter & April

Peter Witkowski Discipleship

The Power of Biblical Thinking

Reeling from the suicides of Fashion Designer Kate Spade and Chef Anthony Bourdain, the American public is again discussing pain, sorrow, and depression. We all recognize that life is marred by hurt and sadness. Even fame and fortune cannot stave off discouragement, sorrow, and hopelessness.

And sorrow and suffering are not just subjects found in that afflict those outside the church. Both evils regularly afflict Christians. The Prince of Preachers, Charles Spurgeon was frequently attacked by depression as he struggled with gout, rheumatism, and neuritis,  as he was attacked by the media and other pastors, and as he endured a daunting daily schedule. Once after a prankster caused a stampede at his church that result in the deaths of seven people, Spurgeon fell into a deep depression. His wife said, “My beloved’s anguish was so deep and violent, that reason seemed to totter in her throne, and we sometimes feared that he would never preach again.”

As the late preacher R.C. Sproul said,

The presence of faith gives no guarantee of the absence of spiritual depression; however, the dark night of the soul always gives way to the brightness of the noonday light of the presence of God.

Christians suffer all kinds of hardships including, sickness, persecution, hunger, rejection, and even death. And as we bump against the hardships of life and ministry, we can be tempted to lose hope. We can become tempted to stay in bed, to stop going to class and to stop attending church. What do we do when those moments come? What do we do when reason itself seems to be replaced we depression, sadness, and hopelessness? How do we get back to the brightness of the noon day?

We remember! Specifically we:

Remember Jesus Christ, risen from the dead, the offspring of David!

Paul tells his mentee in the faith, Timothy, to remember the resurrection of Jesus Christ. Paul tells Timothy that the key to the Christian life is found in Biblical thinking. As Timothy constantly and regularly dwells on the reality of the resurrection of Jesus Christ and on Jesus humanity, he will find the power to suffer well.

Paul mentions Jesus resurrection, because it is the crux of our faith, the centerpiece of the gospel. 1 Corinthians 15:3-8 says,

For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures,  that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures, and that he appeared to Cephas, then to the twelve. Then he appeared to more than five hundred brothers at one time, most of whom are still alive, though some have fallen asleep. Then he appeared to James, then to all the apostles.  Last of all, as to one untimely born, he appeared also to me.

Christ resurrection is a matter of first importance. Because Christ is alive, death is conquered and salvation is possible. We have every reason to hope as Paul writes later in verse 11b-12a, “If we have died with him, we will also live with him; if we endure, we will also reign with him. “

The hope of the Christian life begins and ends with the resurrection. Pastor C.J. Mahaney rightfully notes, “Reminding ourselves of the gospel is the most important daily habit we can establish.”  Because Christ lives, we too will live. We will live in eternity with him. We will once again walk and commune with God like Adam and Eve did, lacking shame and enjoying close, intimate, and unbroken fellowship with our God.

The-Power-of-Biblical-ThinkingAnd we also find our hope for tomorrow. Because Christ lives, we know we can gain victory over our sin. We will find the brightness of the noonday sun. We will be able to overcome lust, pride, depression, anger, and covetousness. Our sin and our failures and our sorrow over our failures are not the end of our story. Christ is alive. And we are alive in Christ. The same power the brought Christ to life is the same power that guarantees our victory over today’s trials and the guarantees the glorious of the next life. When we feel down and sorrowful, we should head Paul’s advice and remember the resurrected Jesus.

And we should remember that Jesus is the offspring of David. Jesus is fully man. He suffered like you and I have suffered. He was tempted just like you and I have been and will be. Jesus understands our frailty. And he is not a demanding father who requires  us to do the impossible in our own strength. He is not the over zealous Little-Coach who expects his kids to lead the team in home runs, failing to notice that his little guy is 3’5″ and weighs only 55 lbs. Our God is a compassionate savior who understands and empathizes with our weakness and struggles. Hebrews 4:15-16 states,

For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.

Often the very shame of having to admit to God that we struggle drives us deeper into despair. After all why would God help someone as messed up as me? Yet He does! He delights in helping us when we are hopeless. God does not demand that we find hope apart from us and then show up to his throne looking all prime an proper. God invites us to come to him when we feel like staying in bed, when we try to avoid every other human being, and when we lock ourselves away in our room. He invites us to come to him when we look more like a homeless person than a doctor, college student, or well-organized mom. He does not expect us to approach Him in strength. Rather he gives grace and help to us in our time of need. He invites the weak to come to him for strength.  Spurgeon rightfully found great hope in the humanity of Christ once saying,

As the mother feels with the weakness of her babe, so does Jesus feel with the poorest, saddest, and weakest of his chosen.

Christ cares deeply about his hurting and suffering children and freely offers to help all.

Remember that Christ is the seed of David. Remember he does not hand us punishment but mercy and grace in our time of need. Stop pretending to be alright and ask God for help. He will give it to us. And we know he can liberate us from our sorrow for he has conquered death. He reigns and will we reign with Him!

If you feel down today, if you feel depressed, and if you feel overcome by sorrow, reflect upon the risen Lord, the seed of David. Daily fight to remember all that Christ did on the cross and remember Christ’s compassion. Think biblically and the light of the noonday will come. Christ, the seed of David, is risen. Do you remember?

Peter Witkowski Pain & Suffering

Doing The Hard Thing Is Not Always The Good Thing

Why Doing A Hard Thing Maybe Wrong blogOften Christians think that hard equals good. If a decision is super hard, then it must really right. Because people disagree with us and criticize us, we assume we are on God’s side. After all, there is a correlation between suffering and holiness or so we think.

And while it is true that we will suffer hardship when we follow Christ, not all suffering is the result of good works. The Scriptures clearly say, “But let none of you suffer as a murderer or a thief or an evildoer or as a meddler” (I Peter 4:15). At times, Christians suffer hardship not because of their Christian witness but because of their selfish hearts.

As a kid I experienced that type of suffering over and over again. One fall semester, I had to do an extra hour of homework most every night because I kind of ‘forgot’ to read my summer reading list. I missed pickup baseball games, bike riding, and a whole host of other fun things. I was suffering at the hands of my parents (or so I thought). But I was not extra holy. I was suffering for because I was extra sinful.

Many times as adults, we suffer for the same reason. We have broken relationships, we are gossiped about, and we are in and out of drama because we sinned. And while our poor decisions do not justify the sins of others, we must realize that our sins have consequences. As Paul says in Galatians 6:7 “Do not be deceived: God is not mocked, for whatever one sows, that will he also reap.” If we steal, lie, and attack others with our words, we will reap destruction, hurt, and broken relationships. We will experience many hard things because we are being foolish. “The way of the treacherous is their ruin” (Prov. 13:15).

As the great pastor D. Martin Lloyd-Jones said,

If you break God’s laws and violate His rules you will not be happy. If you think that you can be a Christian and exert your own will and follow your own likes and dislikes, your Christian life is going to be a miserable one. – P114 SD

So how do we know if we are suffering for our sin or if we are going through a trial like Job? Consider these three questions:

1. Is there unconfessed sin in my heart?

If we are living in sin, our lives will not go well. There is no blessing apart from Christ. The Christian trying to find comfort, hope, and peace while refusing to obey Christ will only find sorrow, despair, and anger. If you have unconfessed sin and are a believer, God will discipline you. You will feel miserable (Psalm 32:3). The solution is to return to Christ. We must pray the words of Psalm 123:23-24 which says:

Search me, O God, and know my heart!

Try me and know my thoughts!

And see if there be any grievous way in me,

and lead me in the way everlasting!

We must examine our hearts and quickly repent of any and all confessed sin.

2. Is this a direct consequence of my sin?

For example if you get fired from your job for looking at pornography, you are not being punished for being godly. You are suffering because you have sinned. The firing and the ensuing suffering is a direct consequence of your sin. Recall Galatians 6:7. The solution is to repent of your sins. And as you draw near to God, he will draw near to you. You will once again experience his blessing.

But if you get liver cancer the next month, I would not assume that the cancer is related to lust or some other sin you recently committed. Suffering is not always a direct consequence of our personal sin. God brings trials into our lives for all kinds of reasons. If the suffering is not a direct consequence of sin, we should not assume that we are being punished. This was the mistake Job’s friends made. They could not understand suffering apart from the presence of personal sin. But we can. When we suffer and there is no direct link back to a personal sin, we should stop fishing for a cause and place our hope and trust in the one who delivers us from the valley of the shadow of death.

3. Is God Getting Glory?

Often this can be hard to tell in the immediacy of the situation. We cannot directly see how God is getting glory. But if we can pull back and see that our sickness, our financially loss, and our other situations are helping us or others more resemble Christ, then we can be sure that our suffering is not only because of our sin. God is using it for our good. When we confess our sins and repent of our actions, God will turn our trials into good. As Llyod-Jones wrote, “God’s greatest concern for us is not primarily our happiness but our holiness. In His love to us He is determined to bring us to that, and He employs many differing means to that end.” Suffering is not always a result of our sin. Often it an evidence of God’s love for us.

When we take our suffering to Christ, our hardships will always refine our hearts. It helps us shift our hope away from earthly measures to heavenly treasures. If we are becoming perfect and complete, our trial, our hardship, our struggle is a great thing.

My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, 3knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing. – James 1:2

In short, not every hardship or struggle is a result of our faithfulness. Our life may very well be difficult because we have sin deeply embedded in our souls. But regardless of the reason for our suffering, it is never pointless. And if we responding to suffering by seeking Christ, we will find abundant life. Are you ready to suffer for the right reasons?